BOOK VI.

SATIRE I'

Semel insanivimus.

LABEO reserves a long nayle for the nonce',
To wound my margent thro' ten leaves at once;
Much worse than Aristarchus his black pile,
That pierc'd olde Homer's side:-

And makes such faces, that mee seemes I see
Some foule Megara in the Tragedie,

Threatning her twined snakes at Tantale's ghost;
Or the grim visage of some frowning post,
The crab-tree porter of the Guild-Hall gates,
Whiles he his frightfull beetle elevates,
His angry eyne looke all so glaring bright,
Like th' hunted badger in a moonelesse night,
Or like a painted staring Saracin :

His cheeks change hew like th' ayre-fed vermin's skin,

1 This last Book and Satire is a humorous and ironical recantation of the former Satires: as the author here pretends there can be no just ground for one in such times as his own. In one part he again glances at the sorry poets of his time, and makes some terse allusions to poets of a former day. Afterwards, when enumerating some of the festive tales of our ancestors, he gives a close and spirited imitation from Juvenal: and closes the whole by a few remarks on the prevailing dialect of Poetry, with a vigour of fancy scarcely rivalled by the finest poets of his time. E.

2 Labeo was undoubtedly some contemporary poet, a constant censurer of our author; and who, from pastoral, proceeded to heroic poetry. Warton thought it might be Chapman, though he did not recollect that Chapman wrote any pastorals. Compare Attius Labeo, in Persius. E.

3

- for the nonce—for the purpose, occasion.

• Much worse than Aristarchus his blacke pile, That pierc'd olde Homer's side

The name of Aristarchus had long been used to express a rigid critic. Cic. Orat. in Pisonem. cap. 30. Hor. Ars Poet. 445. Ausonius: Ludus Septem Sapientum, p. 265. E. Pile is probably from the Latin pilum, the head of an arrow.

A picture from the life of the tremendous Gog and Magog, which have been the terror of every successive generation of citizens when children, and their ridicule

when men.

6

Now red, now pale; and, swolne above his eyes,
Like to the old Colossian ymageries.
But, when he doth of my recanting heare,
Away, ye angry fires, and frostes of feare:
Give place unto his hopefull temper'd thought,
That yeelds to peace, ere ever peace be sought.
Then let mee now repent mee of my rage,
For writing Satyres, in so righteous age:
Whereas I should have strok❜t her tow'rdly head,
And cry'd Evae in my Satyres' stead,

Sith now not one of thousand does amisse.
Was never age I weene so pure as this!
As pure as olde Labulla from the baynes,

As pure as through-fare channels when it raynes;
As pure as is a black-more's face by night,
As dung-clad skin of dying Heraclite.
Seeke over all the world, and tell me where
Thou find'st a proud man, or a flatterer;
A theefe, a drunkard, or a parricide,
A lechour, lyer, or what vice beside.
Marchants are no whit covetous of late,
Nor make no mart of time, gaine of deceit.
Patrons are honest now, ore they of old:
Can now no benefice be boughte or sold.
Give him a gelding, or some two yeares' tithe,
For he all bribes and Simony defi'the.

7

8

Is not one pick-thanke stirring in the court,
That seld was free till now, by all report.
But some one, like a claw-backe parasite,
Pick't mothes from his master's cloake in sight;
Whiles he could picke out both his eyes for need,
Mought they but stand him in some better steed.
Nor now no more smell-feast Vitellio

Smiles on his master for a meale or two;
And loves him in his maw, loaths in his heart,
Yet soothes, and Yeas and Nayes on eyther part.
Tattelius, the new-come traveller ",

With his disguised cote and ringed eare,

through-fare channels

i. e. kennels in great thorough-fares, through which a great body of water pours when it rains; not through faire, as the Oxford Editor reads, without authority, and to the destruction of all sense.

Marston also reprehends, in a character resembling this of our author, the swag

Trampling the burse's marble twise a day ",
Tells nothing but starke truths, I dare well say;
Nor would he have them knowne for any thing,
Tho' all the vault of his loud murmur ring.
Not one man tells a lye of all the yeare,
Except the Almanacke or the Chronicler.
But not a man of all the damned-crue,
For hils of gold would sweare the thing untrue.
Pansophus now, though all in a cold swatt",
Dares venture through the feared castle-gate,
Albee the faithfull oracles have foresayne
The wisest Senator shall there be slaine :
That made him long keepe home, as well it might;
Till now he hopeth of some wiser wight.
The vale of Stand-gate, or the Suter's hill,
Or westerne playne, are free from feared ill".
Let him, that hath nought, feare nought I areed":
But he, that hath ought, hy him, and God speed!
Nor drunken Dennis doth, by breake of day,
Stumble into blinde tavernes by the way,
And reele mee homeward at the ev'ning starre,
Or ride more eas'ly in his neighbour's chayre.
Well might these checks have fitted former times,
And shouldred angry Skelton's breath-lesse rimes "

gerers of his time; who, in their rambles about the town, visited the Royal Exchange as mercantile travellers. The Royal Exchange was also frequented by hungry walkers, as well as St. Paul's. Robert Hayman, in his Quodlibets or Epigrams. Lond. 1628. 4to. Epigr. 35. p. 6. has

To Sir Pearce Pennilesse.

"Though little coyne thy purselesse pockets lyne,
Yet with great company thou'rt taken up ;
For often with Duke Humfray thou dost dyne,
And often with Sir Thomas Gresham sup.'

" Trampling the burse's marble twise a day.

W.

The Royal Exchange received the name of Bourse from Sir Thomas Gresham; and exchanged it for its present name, in 1570, by order of Queen Elizabeth. E.

12 Pansophus now, though all in a cold swatt,

The is the reading of the edition of 1599, and the Oxford.

13 The vale of Stand-gate, or the Suter's hill,

Or westerne playne, are free from feared ill.

Stand-gate vale probably means Stand-gate Street, in Lambeth.-Suter's or Shooter's Hill is well known.-By westerne playne, the site now occupied by St. James's and Hyde Parks was most likely intended.

" And shouldred angry Skelton's breath-lesse rimes.

So Phillips, in the Theatrum Poetarum, p. 115, says of Skelton, "Methinks he hath a miserable loos rambling style, and galloping measure of verse." E.

Ere Chrysalus had bar'd the common boxe,
Which earst he pick't to store his private stocks;
But now hath all with vantage paide againe,
And locks and plates what doth behind remaine:
When earst our dry-soul'd syres so lavish were,
To charge whole boots'-full to their friend's wel-fare;
Now shalt thou never see the salt beset

With a big-bellyed gallon flagonet ".
Of an ebbe Cruce must thirsty Silen sip,
That's all forestalled by his upper lip ".
Somewhat it was that made his paunch so peare
His girdle fell ten ynches in a yeare.
Or when old gouty bed-rid Euclio

To his officious factor fayre could show
His name in margent of some olde cast bill,
And say, Lo! whom I named in my will;
Whiles hee beleeves, and, looking for the share,
Tendeth his cumbrous charge with busy care
For but a while; for now he sure will die,
By this strange qualme of liberalitie ".

18

Great thanks he gives-but, God him shield and save
From ever gayning by his master's grave:

Onely live long and he is well repayd,

And weats his forced cheeks whiles thus he said;
Some strong-smeld onion shall stirre his eyes

Rather than no salt teares shall then arise.

So lookes he like a marble toward rayne,

And wrings, and snites", and weeps, and wipes againe :
Then turnes his backe and smiles, and lookes askance,
Seas'ning againe his sowred" countenance;
Whiles yet he wearies heav'n with daily cryes,
And backward death with devout sacrifice,

16 Now shalt thou never see the sall beset With a big bellyed gallon flagonet.

See Note 37, on Book ii. Sat. 6.

"Of an EBBE CRUCE must thirsty Silen sip, That's all forestalled by his upper lip.

An ebbe cruce probably means a shallow vessel, the contents of which ebbed or returned against the upper lip, and disappointed the drinker.

To peer is, to come just in sight. By peare, our author may mean shrunk in.

19 By THIS strange qualme of liberalitie.

This is restored from the first edition; his being that of the other editions.

20

snites a term in Falconry. "A hawk is said to smite or snite, when she wipes her beak or bill after feeding". See Phillips's New World of Words.

21

soured-The Oxford editor reads sorrow'd, without authority.