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to the things of eternal life! that I could escape these, though I were in the hands of the most cruel enemies! O that such a heart could be left behind! To outrun it, how gladly would I quit house, and land, and honour, and all sensual delights! O that I knew the place, where there is none of this darkness, nor disaffection, nor distance from God! O that I could find it! O that I might dwell there, though I should never more see the face of mortals, nor ever hear a human voice, nor ever taste the delights of flesh! Alas, foolish soul, such a place there is, that has all this, and more than this; but it is in paradise, not in the wilderness; it is above with Christ, not here upon

earth! And am I yet so loath to die? Am I yet no more desirous of the blessed day, when I shall be unclothed of flesh and sin? O death what an enemy art thou even to my soul, by frighting me from the presence of my Lord, and hindering my desires and willingness to be gone? This is wronging me much more, than by laying my flesh to rot in darkness. Fain would I know God, and love and enjoy him more. But this hurtful love of present life! O this unreasonable fear of dying! "O

wretched man that I am! Who shall deliver me from this body of death?" From this carnal unbelieving heart, that can sometimes think more delightfully of a wilderness than of

heaven? That can seek after God in desert solitude, among birds, and beasts, and trees; and yet is so backward to be loosed from flesh, that I might find him, and

enjoy him

Can I ex

in the world of glory? pect that heaven should come down to earth, and that the Lord of glory should remove his court, and either leave the retinue of his celestial courtiers, or bring them all down into this simple world, to satisfy my fleshly mind? Or can I expect the translation of Enoch, or the chariot of Elijah? Is it not enough that my Lord has conquered death, and sanctified the passage, and prepared the place of my perpetual abode? Well! Though a wilderness be not heaven, it shall

be swee. and welcome for the sake of heaven, if from thence I may but have a clearer prospect of heaven; and if, by retiring from the crowd and noise of folly, I may but be better disposed to converse above, and to use, alas, my too weak and languid faith, till it be exchanged for the beatific vision. May there but be more of God, readier access to him, more flaming love, more heart-comforting intimations in his favour, in a wilderness than in a city, in a prison than in a palace; let that wilderness be my city, and that prison my palace, as long as I abide on earth. If, in solitude, I may have Enoch's walk with God, I shall in due season have such a translation, as will bring me to the

same felicity which he enjoys; and in the mean time, as well as after, it is no disadvantage, if by mortal eyes I am seen no more. If the chariot of contemplation will, in solitude, raise me to more believing affectionate converse with heaven, than I could expect in tumults and temptations, it shall reconcile me to solitude, and make it my paradise on earth, till angels, instead of Elijah's chariot, shall convey me to the presence of my glorified Jesus."

Sect. III. Is it grievous to you to be alone, because you have been used to much company? Consider, that company may so abuse you, that it may be more grievous to you not to be alone. You will not wish for the