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fident he has only to stoop for it. Milton's dough, to the worst, even there. Unless you sign a cerit must be acknowledged, is never the lightertificate of their health and vigour, your windows for the bitter barm he kneads up with it. and lamps may be broken by the mischievous
Southey. The sabbath of his mind required rabble below. no levities, no excursions or amusements. But Landor. Marauders will cook their greens and he was not ill-tempered. The worst-tempered bacon, though they tear down cedar pannels for men have often the greatest and readiest store of the purpose. pleasantries. Milton, on all occasions indignant Southey. There is an incessant chatterer, who and wrathful at injustice, was unwilling to repress has risen to the first dignities of state, by the the signification of it when it was directed against same means as nearly all men rise now by ; himself. However, I can hardly think he felt so namely, opposition to whatever is done or promuch as he expresses ; but he seized on bad jected by those invested with authority. He will models in his resolution to show his scholarship. never allow us to contemplate greatness at our Disputants, and critics in particular, followed one leisure: he will not allow us indeed to look at it another with invectives; and he was thought to for a moment. Cæsar must be stript of his lauhave given the most manifest proof of original rels and left bald; or some reeling soldier, some genius who had invented a new form of reproach. insolent swaggerer, some stilted ruffian, thrust I doubt if Milton was so contented with his dis- before his triumph. If he fights, he does not comfiture of Satan, or even with his creation of know how to use his sword ; if he speaks, he Eve, as with the overthrow of Salmasius under speaks vile Latin. I wonder that Cromwell fares the loads of fetid brimstone he fulminated no better; for he lived a hypocrite and he died a against him.
traitor. I should not recall to you this ridiculous It is fortunate we have been sitting quite alone man, to whom the Lords have given the run of while we detected the blemishes of a poet we both the House .. a man pushed off his chair by every venerate. The malicious are always the most party he joins, and enjoying all the disgraces he ready to bring forward an accusation of malice : incurs .. were it not that he has also, in the fulness and we should certainly have been served, before of his impudence, raised his cracked voice and long, with a writ pushed under the door. incondite language against Milton.
Landor. Are we not somewhat like two little Landor. I hope his dapple fellow-creatures in beggar-boys, who, forgetting that they are in tat- the lanes will be less noisy and more modest as ters, sit noticing a few stains and rents in their we pass along them homeward. father's raiment?
Southey. Wretched as he is in composition, Southey. But they love him.
superficial as he is in all things, without a glimLet us now walk homeward. We leave behind mer of genius, or a grain of judgment, yet his us the Severn and the sea and the mountains; abilities and acquirements raise him somewhat and, if smaller things may be mentioned so sud- high above those more quiescent and unaspiring denly after greater, we leave behind us the sun-ones, you call his fellow-creatures. dial, which marks, as we have been doing in Landor. The main difference is, that they are regard to Milton, the course of the great lumi- subject to have their usual burdens laid upon nary by a slender line of shadow.
them all their lives, while his of the woolsack is Landor. After witnessing his glorious ascen- taken off for ever. The allusion struck me from sion, we are destined to lower our foreheads over the loudness and dissonance of his voice, the the dreary hydropathy and flanelly voices of the wilfulness and perverseness of his disposition, and swathed and sinewless.
his habitude of turning round on a sudden and Southey. Do not be over-sure that you are come kicking up behind.
QUEEN ELIZABETH, CECIL, DUKE OF ANJOU, AND DE LA MOTTE FENELON.
Elizabeth. You are only nineteen, M. D'Anjou : La Motte (aside.) They have all been gone the I, as all the world knows, am bordering on thirty. best part of the time.
La Motte (aside.) Thirty-nine, that is. (Pretty Anjou. Angelic vision! I am unworthy of bordering).
them; Earth may be so too. Death alone can Elizabeth (continuing.) If in fifteen or twenty deprive her of their radiance; but the angels can years, sooner or later, I should haply lose a part be happy without them; and mankind hath not of those personal charms which, for the benefit of so sinned a second time as to deserve a deluge, my people, God's providence hath so bountifully a universal deluge of tears for which no ark hath bestowed on me, and which your partial eye hath been provided. multiplied ; if they should wane, and their power Elizabeth (to Cecil.) He speaks well, rationally, over your gentle heart become fainter .. die 1 religiously : but, Cecil! the inches are wanting. must; die of grief; the grievousest of grief; the Anjou. A few years are as unlikely to produce loss of your affection.
a change on that countenance of a seraph, as Anjou. Impossible! Such charms perish! wane! eternity is to produce it in my passion. decline! in fifteen or twenty years !
Elizabeth. I can not but smile at you, my sweet
cousin! But surely you mock me. Do my fea Elizabeth. But the inches ! Cecil! the inches ! tures (which, alas ! like my heart, were ever too Anjou. I perceive your Majesty has been comflexible) seem to you so settled ?
paring my stature with my lord Burleigh's. I Anjou. Not otherwise than as the stars above wish indeed I resembled his lordship in figure are settled in the firmament.
and dignity. I would gladly be half an inch Elizabeth. Believe it or not believe it, I have taller. been more beautiful.
Elizabeth. Men never are contented. You are La Mothe (aside.) No heretic will ever be burnt between five and six feet high. for disputing the verity of that article.
(Aside.) Eleven inches from six though. Anjou. More beautiful still?
Anjou. If my highth is unobjectionable, my Elizabeth. Ay truly, two years ago.
heart is quite at ease : for it has been certified to Anjou. Truth is powerful; but modesty is me that the surgeon can render my face as powerfuller. Here indeed Truth flies before her. smooth as .. For this uncourteous speech, thus extorted from Elizabeth (aside.) The outside of an oysterme, on my knees do I crave your pardon, 0 gra- shell. cious queen! O empress of my heart !
Anjou. And should he fail, should he peradElizabeth. I increase in glory by that appli- venture, my beard in another year will overgrow cation,
the marks. Anjou. I have always heard that the lofty of Elizabeth (to Cecil.) Such creatures are usually both sexes love the less in stature, and that the born with beards from chin to eyebrow, and from beautiful are partial to the plain.
eyebrow to nose. Elizabeth. Am I plain? false traitor! I could (To Anjou.) Beards so comprehensive add more almost find it in my heart to beat you, for chang- to majesty than to comeliness. ing your tone so suddenly.
(To Cecil.) 'Fore Gad ! Cecil, I would not have Anjou. That gracious glance could heal even him for a husband, were he ten inches taller, and Founds inflicted by the rack, and turn agonies into ten wider across the shoulders. To gratify my eestacies. I spake (alas too truly !) of myself. beloved people, on whom all my thoughts are Whatever are the graces which the world sees in bent, I must look narrowly to the succession, my person, I am shorter than several in the courts seeing that from my body must descend the issue of France and England. Indeed I never saw so of their future kings. We want the inches, Cecil! many personable men before, as I have seen about we verily do want the inches. My father was a your Majesty.
portly man, Cecil ! and my grandfather, albeit Elizabeth (aside.) He has caught some of his spare, was wirily elastic. For reasons of state, I brother Henry's jealousy: maybe he hath spied at would never have my sister Mary's widower. The Dudley: maybe he hath heard of the admiral and nation might possibly have been disappointed in the rest.
the succession, and I should have wasted away Sir! my cousin ! they are well enough : that is, among the bleeding hearts of my people. Say they are well enough for grooms, and servitors something to the man, and let him go. Were about the house.
there the inches .. but we must not press upon Anjou. Your Majesty is now looking at those that point. unfortunate holes and seams left all over my face Cecil. May it please your Majesty, ten or a by the small-pox.
dozen in highth and breadth would cover a multiElizabeth. Dimples ! dimples ! hiding-places of tude of sins, and almost atone for the mass. Love.
Elizabeth. At him upon that! La Motte ! did you not assure me that there is Anjou. I do perceive there are difficulties ; but a surgeon in London who can remove them all ? I humbly trust that none of them are insur.
La Motte. And most truly. I have conversed mountable. with him myself, and have seen many whose faces Elizabeth. Excuse my maidenly sighs, sweet he hath put into repair. You would believe that cousin ! the greater part had never had a speck upon La Motte (aside.) No sighs of that description them.
have escaped her since she was fourteen. The Elizabeth. Touch your face? would you let him? first and last of them caught the sails of the High would you suffer him to alter one feature, one Admiral, and cast him on the breakers. component of feature, in that countenance ? Anjou. Those tender breathings, most gracious
Anjou. My moth has insisted that it might | lady, seem to arise from my breast, and to murbe improved.
mur on your lips; those beauteous lips which Elizabeth. My dear sister the Queen Catarina may soften or shorten the thread of my destiny. is the wisest of queens and of women. A mother Elizabeth. Faith and troth, Cecil, this rogue so perspicacious might espy a defect, when another duke possesses a vast treasury of jewelled lanof equal perspicacity (if any such existed) could guage. The boy is well educated and hath much
discernment. It would cost no ordinary poet half (To Cecil.) What a monkey! How hideous! a day's labour, and the better part of his ten and bow vain! worst of all !
nails, to have devised what our cousin bath spoken Cecil. His Highness hath much penetration. off-hand.
(To Anjou). Sir, my cousin ! of all the princes me: yon know not what love is. O imperfection who have wooed me, none so well knows the of speech! In the presence of Anjou to separate avenues to my heart as you do. I beseech you, war and glory! But when will you return? urge me no further in this moment of my weak Anjou. Before the end of next month at
The woman who avoweth her love loseth farthest. her lover. Forbear! O forbear! have patience ! Elizabeth. What years, what ages, roll within leave my wits to settle! Time, too clearly I per- that period ! My heart is already on the ocean ceive it, will only rivet my chains.
with you, swelling more tumultuously. The La Motte (to A njou). He hath taken his leisure danger I most dread is from the elements; no in forging them, and hath left them brittle at last. other enemy is great enough to hurt you. Only
Anjou (to La Motte). Forty-nine years! Women look from the window! The waves are beating of that age have bent down their spectacles over and roaring against our town of Sandwich, ready the cradles of their great-grandchildren. In God's to engulf it. name, La Motte ! how much older do they ever Anjou. Sweet lady! the sun is shining on the grow ?
eighth of February as brightly as it ever shone Elizabeth. What did I overhear of children? on May before. But shines it not at this moThe Lord vouchsafe us whatever number of girls ment on May ? it may please his Divine Providence! I would Elizabeth. Flatterer! deceiver! I am shipimplore of it, in addition, only just two boys; one wrecked and lost already. Adieu ! adieu ! ... for France, and one for England.
must I only say .. my cousin! La Motte. We can not be quite happy with Anjou. She is gone :
God be praised ! why fewer than four girls, may it please your majesty. did not you tell me, Fénelon! what a hyæna the
Elizabeth. It pleaseth me well : and I see no creature is? Her smile cured me at once of lovedifficulty in inserting so discreet a prayer in our qualms. Litany. But why four? why four precisely? La Motte. She is not so amiss. Really she was
La Motte. May it please your majesty! in order well-looking no longer than some twenty years to represent their mother and the Graces. In the ago. But every woman has been several women first I have presumed to mention, the cardinal if she has lived long. The English at this hour virtues have already their representative.
call her handsome. Cecil. M. De La Motte Fénelon ! her majesty A njou. The English may be good historians; has been graciously pleased to impose on me her they are bad grammarians; they confound the royal command, that I should express her majes- preterite and present. Beside, to call her ty's deep sorrow (since she herself is incapable in otherwise, would cost the best among them his this presence of expressing any such sentiment) head. How many days ago is it that she chopped at the strange misadventure, the sad untoward off the hand of the most eloquent and honest man demise, of so many Protestant lords and gentle in her universities, for disapproving of her inmen, in his most Christian majesty's good city of tended marriage with me? and yet he praised her Paris, on the feast of St. Bartholomew last past. and spoke affectionately. What prince, whether And her most gracious majesty, in the tenderness in modern times or ancient, ever inflicted so many of her royal heart
, urged by the cries and clamours and such atrocious pains and penalties, or ever of her loving subjects, would remonstrate, how- expected such enormous sums in proportion to ever blandly, thereupon. In order to pacify her the ability of the people ? But in England the people, who are dearer to her than life, and in pack is well whipt in, and always follows the first order that no delay whatever may be interposed hound at full cry, muzzle to hoof. The English to your forthcoming nuptials, her majesty would have belief for everything but religion: there fain insure your highness's compliance with the they would run wild; only a few good Cathoestablished religion of the realm ; and is ready to lics whimper and sit quiet. Englishmen verily accept any valid security, that your and her believe the queen loves them tenderly, while they royal progeny (the first-born and second-born see one after another led with the halter round son especially) be educated in the same. The their necks up the ladder, some wanting their daughters, in course, follow the footsteps of the ears, some their noses, and some their hands. mother.
Talk to me of St. Bartholomew's day! The dead Anjou. My children can receive no better upon that day died whole. instruction than from their most religious and What stomachs have these islanders! The accomplished mother. I am tolerant of all reli- Lord High Admiral well deserved his commisgions; and to give a proof of it, I am going to sion ; but he was braver on land than at sea. fight for the Protestants in the Low-Countries. La Motte. The English drink valiantly, and
Elizabeth (to Cecil). Do not let him go : he will do not see clearly small defects in beauty by bedobtain great influence over them, and curtail our time. They are hale, and deem it unmeet and traffic and taxes.
unmanly to be squeamish. (To Anjou). O Anjou! Anjou ! O my beloved Anjou. So it appears, by what my brother told Francis ! do you, must you, can you, leave us ? me, and by what (as we know) went against the My sobs choke me. Is war, is even glory, pre- grain with him. But he was heir-apparent. If ferable to love ? Alas! alas ! you can not answer Dudley had been a gentleman by descent, Charles
perhaps might not have so taken to heart his face, may try his hand at hers; I never will. precedency.
Sacre! the skinny old goshawk, all talon and La Motte. She has points about her.
plumage. By St. Martin ! I would not have her Anjou. Ay truly; too many. Were her nose .. no, not even to nail against my stable-door. but awry, she might see to read through it. Then I do not wonder that Dudley requires a couple of (mercy upon us !) those long narrow ferret's teeth, wives to take the taste of this wormwood out of intersecting a face of such proportions, that it is his mouth. My wonder is, that he should have like a pared cucumber set on end. And then those been at the trouble to murder the same number foxy eyelashes and eyebrows! And those wild- of handsome ones to make room for her. I fire eyes, equal in volubility to her tongue and myself would have done a good deal, perhaps as her affections, and leering like a panther's when much, or nearly so, to get a kingdom ! but my it yawns. Gramercy! the fellow who pretends charger could never overleap this bar. No, La he can fill up the trenches and pitfalls in my Motte! I must be contented with the Netherlands.
WINDHAM AND SHERIDAN. Windham. It is seldom, Mr. Sheridan, that we how the Grenvilles and Temples have always have met anywhere out of the House of Commons speculated on this grand Exchange. They have these last two'years; and I rejoice in the opportu- bought in and sold out with singular discretion. nity of expressing my admiration of your generous Hence a family of small pretensions to antiquity, conduct, on an occasion in which the country at far from affluent until recently, has been somelarge, and I particularly as minister, was deeply what enriched at every generation. Lord Greninterested.
ville, who receives forty thousand a-year from Sheridan. I am happy, sir, to be countenanced his tellership of the Exchequer, which in time of by your favourable opinion on any: but I presume peace brought him scarcely a tenth, was strenuous Fou now refer to my speech on the mutiny at the for war; while Pitt hung back, in suspense for a Nore.
moment whether he should comply with the Windham. Indeed I do: you stood nobly forth king's wishes or retire from office. The Duke of from your party. Never was behaviour more Portland, as you know, stipulated for a renewal ignominious than the behaviour of the Whigs has of the lease of Marybone Park, before he would been, systematically, since the commencement of join the ministry with his adherents. The value the war. Whatever they could do or suggest to of this lease is calculated at two hundred thouthe detriment of their country, or to the advance- sand. The Irish peers may fairly demand somement of France, they seized on with avidity. But thing handsome for the surrender of their power Fou manfully came forward and apart from those and patronage ; I should have added their dignitraitors, declaring that insubordination should be ties, had I not been aware that either to laugh or reduced, and that rebellion should be crushed. to excite laughter, is, at times, unseasonable. I heartily wish, and confidently hope, that you Windham. The terms are not exactly known will display the same energy and decision in the at present; and indeed the business is so compligreat measure of the Union now projected with cated, that doubts are beginning to arise whether
the scheme will be practicable in the present year. Sheridan. I have heard nothing about it, as Sheridan. Much depends on the amount of likely to be carried speedily into execution. But secret service money the parliament will consent the vast number of indigent and worthless people to vote. who have lately been made Irish peers, might This union might be the greatest blessing that excite a suspicion that something of moment was ever was conferred on Ireland. But when I conin agitation. Many must be bought over again. sider how unjustly, how harshly, how treacheSuch men, for instance, as Hely Hutchinson, Lord rously, she has been treated by all administraClonmel, Lord Clare, and other exhalations of the tions, my suspicions rise far above my hopes. It og and dunghill, who have always in readiness is rumoured that the conditions (which however or the service of any Administration a menace, there will be time enough to reconsider and to 1 defiance, and a pistol; such men will never be modify) are less favourable than were granted contented with the few thousands of income they to Scotland : and that what is, and always has lave in various ways obtained : their demands been in every country under heaven, the main vill rise with their services; and unless the de-object, is not to be conceded : I mean the relinands are satisfied, the petitioners will turn into gion of the majority. On the abolition of episvatriots. In such a course is usually the begin- copacy in Scotland, its revenues were applied to iing or the termination of public men: seldom the religious and moral education of the people, roth. The Irish have begun to learn arithmetic who renounced the old religion, rejected the n the English school. Fortunes in this country formulary of the English, and chose another. lave risen so high and so suddenly on the base Surely then in common justice, to say nothing of politics, as to have attracted the gaze and to of policy, nothing of conciliation, those from iave excited the aspiration of Ireland. She sees whom churches and church-lands were taken
away, having at least as fair a claim to such Windham. There are gentlemen in the House things as those who never were in possession of of Commons who insist that where a single man, them, should receive the plunder back. In doing woman, or child, exists in any parish, that parish this to the full extent, you would still do less for should enjoy its parson, if Protestant. Ireland than was done for Scotland.
Sheridan. But there are many parishes in Windhom. We have always been tender in which there is not a single Protestant, man, touching vested rights.
woman, or child : however, as there is a steeple, Sheridan. To my apprehension you were not and not only a steeple, but a pulpit, no doubt very tender in your touch on the vestment of the there should also be a minister of religion for Irish Catholic church. The vestment had indeed their benefit. If towns which contain several too many folds and flounces about it, and, instead thousand inhabitants have no representative at of covering the brawny shoulders of twenty or all, there would be no worse hardship in fewer thirty fathers, might have been conveniently cut than one hundred having no established pastor. up for the shirts and shifts of as many hundred But this hardship might not befall them : for they children. But you never drew out scissars or might elect one; and they might themselves pay measure for that purpose : you only stripped him proportionally to the service he renders; or the vesture off one fat fellow to clap it on another they might remove into a more convenient and fatter.
less contracted fellowship. The most pious and Windham. True enough. The bishop of Derry's serious of the English people are taught the doclanded property extends, I hear, over a hundred trines of the English church by unendowed minisand fifty thousand acres; and cottagers pay thirty ters. The followers of Wesley do not hanker shillings a year for half acres, not the best, of after gowns and surplices; at least such gowns this very land. Suppose that at the termination and surplices as mount the pulpit. Well-educated of the war, after hard cruises, hard battles, and young men of his persuasion are always in readiharder blockades, all our admirals return home, ness to accept the cure of souls. It is only the many with amputated limbs, many with incurable earnest and patient who are likely to file the old wounds, many indeed most) with broken or rust and new paint off the crucifix. The Wesleyimpaired constitutions; raise the number of them ans may be too impetuous, heady, and frothy; but to half a hundred; and the consolidated pay of a gutter that runs with rapidity is less unwholethese half hundred great and glorious defenders some than a stagnant ditch. I feel that I lie of their country, will be less than the pay of one open to a charge of partiality in this recommenchurchman.
dation of the Methodists; but I do assure you I Sheridan. And it is painful to think of how am not about to join them: and I venture to much shorter date.
hope that your
smile is not a smile of incredulity. Windham. Have they no reason to complain of Windham. Be perfectly at ease. But seriously; such inequality? have they no right to check and in turning out this acid on such putridity, there correct it?
would be a violent fermentation : there would All of what are called church lands belong be animosities and conflicts. However, what to the state, as the church itself does; and harm, if there should be ? Turn out the weasel bishoprics have, since the Reformation, not only against the rat, and, at least while they are fightbeen curtailed, but abolished. If Parliament can ing, neither of them can corrode the rafters or take away a whole bishopric, it surely can take infest the larder. Your countrymen are a joyous away à moiety, especially that moiety which and light-hearted people, and run with alacrity bishops care least about, the temporalities. Griev- to festivals and fairs. They would not so readily ous responsibility would be thus removed from fall in with Calvinism; they are more disposed them. No longer a necessity to rise early and to fighting, frolic, and pardon. to sit down late, for the purpose of supplying the Sheridan. Frolic and pardon they would never indigent and afflicted: no longer a solicitude in find among the Calvinists, who however in strict seeking out the faithful, merciful, discreet, and justice would amply make out the difference, with active almoner: no longer the worldly care of fighting. laying aside the larger part of their revenues, in Windham. We will revert to the right which just and exact proportions, for families more or all governments possess, of curtailing or abolishless numerous, for curates more or less laborious, ing the hire of their servants : I admit it. The “ for sick widows and young children.”
question at last resolves itself into mere expeIn other parts of Europe to which the Reforma- diency. If our government, after a war, reduces tion has extended, not only the religion but also the pay of its soldiers, and abolishes altogether the its emoluments have been revised and corrected. pay of its sailors, it may consistently, justly, and Government in England should exercise this legally, do the same in regard to the church authority where required. Where there are no, militant. Whether the pay arises from a turf or or only few, communicants of the Anglican from a counter, no matter. church in Ireland, it is expedient for them to Sheridan. Apply the principle more especially remove to places where there are many. At all to Ireland. A nation has been misruled for events I would maintain no church establishment above six centuries by its conqueror. The confor a less number than a hundred adults, queror has derived the most powerful and efficient