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Pist. How dow, Mepliostophilus?
Eva. But that is not the question; the question is Slen. Ay, it is no matter.
concerning your marriage. Nym. Slice, I say ! pauca, pauca; slice ! that's my Shal. Ay, there's the point, sir. humour.
Eva. Marry, is it; the very point of it; to misSlen. Where's Simple, my man-can you tell, tress Anne Page.. cousin ?
Slen. Why, if it be so, I will marry her, upon any Eva. Peace, I pray yor! Now let us understand : reasonable demands. there is three umpires in this matter, as I understand : Eva. Bat can you affection the 'oman? Let us comthat is,---master Page, fidelicet, master Page ; and
mand to know that of your mouth, or of your lips; there is myself, fidelicet, myself'; and the three party for divers philosophers hold, that the lips is parcel of is, lastly and finally, mine host of the Garter. the mouth ;-thereio e, precisely, can you carry your
Page: We three, to hear it, and end it between good will to the maid? them.
Shal. Cousin Abraham Slender, can you love her! Eva. Ferry goot: I will make a prief of it in my Slen. I hope, sir,-I will do, as it shall become note-book; and we will afterwards 'ork upon the one that would do reason. cause, with as great discreetly as we can.
Era. Nay, Got's lords and his ladies, you must Fal. Pistol,
speak possitable, if you can carry her your desires toPist. He hears with ears.
wards her. Era. The tevil and his tam ! what phrase is this, Shal. That you must : will you, upon good dowry, He hears with ear? Why, it is affectations.
marry her! Fal. Pistol, did you pick master Slender's parse? Slen. I will do a greater thing than that, upon your Slen. Ay, by these gloves did he (or I would request, cousin, in any reason. might never come in mine own great chamber again Shal. Nay, conceive me, conceive me, sweet coz; else), of seven groats in mill-sixpences, and two what I do, is to pleasure you, coz: Can you love the Edward shovel-boards, that cost me two shilling and maid ? two-pence apiece of Yead Miller, by these gloves. Slen. I will marry her, sir, at your request; but if Fal. Is this true, Pistol ?
there be no great love in the beginning, yet heaven Eva. No ; it is false, if it is a pick-purse.
may decrease it apon better acquaintance, when we are Pist. Ha, thou mountain-foreigner !--sir John, and married, and have more occasion to know one anomaster mine,
ther: I hope, upon familiarity will grow more conI combat challenge of this latten bilbo :
tempt : but if you say, marry her, I will marry her, Word of denial in thy labras here;
that I am freely dissolved, and dissolutely. Word of denial; froth and scum, thou liest.
Eva. It is a fery discretion answer ; save, the faul' Sien. By these gloves, then ' was he.
is in the 'ort dissolutely : the 'ort is, according to our Nym. Be advisd, sir, and pass good humours: 1 meaning, resolutely ;-his meaning is good. will say, marry trap, with you, if you run the nut Shal. Ay, I think my cousin meant well. hook's humour on me; hat is the very note of it.
Slen. Ay, or
hang'd, Slen. By this hat, then be in the red face had it : for though I cannot remember what I did when you
Re-enter Anne Page. made me drunk, yet I am not altogether an ass. Shal. Here comes fair mistress Anne :--Would I Fal. Wbat say you, Scarlet and John!
were young, for your sake, mistress Anne! Bard. Why, sir, for my part, I say, the gentleman Anne. The dinner is on the table ; my father dehad drunk himself out of his five sentences.
sires your worships' company: Eva. It is his five senses : fie, what the ignorance Shal. I will wait on him, fair mistress Anne. is !
Eva. Od's plessed will! I will not be absence at Bard. And being fap, sir, was, as they say, ca- the grace,
[Exeunt Shallow and Sir H. Evans. shier'd ; and so conclusions pass'd the careires. Anne. Will't please your worship to come in, sir?
Slen. Ay, you spake in Latin then too; but 'tis no Slen. No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily; I am matter : I'll ne'er be drunk whilst I live again, but very well. in honest, civil, godly company, for this trick: if I Anne. The dinner attends you, sir. be drunk, I'll be drank with those that bave the Slen. I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forsooth: fear of God, and not with drunken knaves.
Go, sirrah, for all you are my man, 80, wait upon my Eva. So Got 'udge me, that is a virtuous mind. cousin Shallow : Exit Simple! A justice of peace
Fal. You hear all these matters denied, gentlemen; sometime may be beholden to his friend for a man : you hear it.
-I keep but three men and a boy yet, till my mother Enter Mistress Anne Page, with Wine; Mistress
be dead: but what though! yet I live like a poor Ford and Mistress Page following:
gentleman born. Page. Nay, daughter, carry the wine in; we'll
Anne. I may not go in without your worship : they drink within.
will not sit, till you come.
[Exit Anne Page. Slen. O heaven! this is mistress Anne Page.
Sien. l'faith, I'll eat nothing ; I thank you as much Page. How now, mistress Ford !
as thoagh I did. Fal. Mistress Ford, by my troth, you are very well
Anne. I pray you, sir, walk in. met: by your leave, good mistress.
Slen. I had rather walk here, I thank you : ! Page: Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome :--Eome, bruised my shin the other day with playing at sword we have a hot venison pasty to dinner ; come, gen
and dagger with a master offence, three veneys for tlemen, I hope we shall drink down all unkindness.
a dish of stewed prunes; and, by my troth, I cannot [Exeunt all but Stal. Slender, and Evans: abide the smell of bot meat since. Why do your Slen. I had rather than torty shillings, I had my dogs bark so? be there bears i'the town? book of songs and sonnets here :
Anne. I think there are, sir; I heard them talked
of. Enter Simple.
Slen. I love the sport well ; bat I shall as soon How now, Simple! where bave you been! I must quarrel at it, as any man in England :--you are afraid, wait on myself, must I? You have not The Book of if you see the bear loose, are you not! Riddles about you, have you?
Anne. Ay, indeed, sir. Sim. Book of Rildles! why, did you not lend it to Slen. That's meat and drink to me now: I have Alice Shortcake, upon Allhallowmas last, a fortnight seen Sackerson loose, twenty times; and have taken afore Michaelmas!
him by the chain : but, I warrant you, the women Shal. Come, coz; come, coz; we stay for you. Ahave so cried and shrieked at it, that it pass'd :-bat word with you, coz: marry, this, coz there is, as women, indeed, cannot abide 'em : they are very ill'twere, a tender, a kind of tender, made afar off by favoured rough things. sir Hugh here;- do you understand me! Slen. Ay, sir, you shall find me reasonable ; if it
Re-enter Page. be so, I shall do that that is reason.
Page. Come, gentle master Slender, come; we Shal. Nay, but inderstand me.
stay for you. Slen. So I do, sir.
šlen. I'll eat nothing; I thank you, sir. Eva. Give ear to his motions, master Slender: I Page. By cock and pye, you shall not choose, sir : will description the matter to you, if you be capacity come, come. of it.
Slen. Nay, pray you, lead the way. Slen. Nay, I will do as my cousin Shallow says : I Page. Come on, sir. pray you, pardon me; he's a justice of peace in his Slen. Mistress Anne, yourself shall go first, country, simple though I stand here.
Anne. Not I, sir; pray you, keep on.
Slen. Truly, I will not go first; truly, la : I will Fal. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with not do you that wrong:
such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her eye Anne. I pray you, sir.
did seem t) scorch me up like a burning-glass ! Here's Slen. I'll rather be unmannerly than troublesome: another letter to her: she bears the purse too : she is you do yourself wrong, indeed, la. [Exeunt. a region in Guiana, all gold and bounty. I will be
cheater to them both, and they shall be exchequers to SCENE II. The same.
me; they shall be my East and West Indies, and I Enter Sir Hagh Evans and Simple.
will trade to them both. Go, bear thou this letter to Eva. Go your ways, and ask of doctor Caius' house, mistress Page ; and thou this to mistress Ford: ve which is the way and there dwels one mistress will thrive, lads, we will thrive. Quickly, which is in the manner of his nurse, or his And by my side wear s'eel? then, Lucifer take all !
Pist. Shall I sir Pandarus of Troy become, dry narse, or his cook, or his laundry, his washer, and his wringer.
Nym. I will run no base bumour; here, take the Sim. Well, sir.
humour letter ; I will keep the 'haviour of reputa
tion. Eva. Nay, it is petter yet:give her this letter ; for it is a 'oman that altogether's acquaintance with
Fal. Hold, sirrah, [To Rob.] bear you these letters mistress Anne Page ; and the letter is, to desire and Sail like my pinnace to these golden shores.
tightly ; require her to solicit your master's desires to mistress Rogues, hence, avaunt! vanish like hail-stones, go; Anne Page : I pray you, be gone; I will make an Trudge, plod, away, o'the hoof; seek shelter, pack'! end of my dinner: there's pippins and cheese to Palstat will learn the humour of this age, come.
French thrift, you rogues ; myself, and skirted page. SCENE III. A Room in the Garter Inn.
(Exeunt Falstaff and Robin.
Pist. Let vultures gripe thy guts! for gourd and Enter Falstaff, Host, Bardolph, Nym, Pistol, and
fullam holds, Robin.
And high and low beguile the rich and poor : Pal. Mine host of the Garter,
Tester I'll have in pouch, when thou shalt lack, Host. What says my bally-rook? Speak scholarly, Base Phrygian Turk ! and wisely.
Nym. I have operations in my head, which be huFal. Truly, mine host, I must turn away some of mours of revenge. my followers
Pist. Wilt thou revenge
? Host. Discard, bully Hercules ; cashier : let them Nym.
By welkin, and her star! wag; trot, trot.
Pist. With wit, or steel? Fal. I sit at ten pounds a week.
With both the humours, I; Host. Thou'rt an emperor, Cæsar, Keisar, and I will discuss the humour of this love to Page. Pheezar. I will entertain Bardolph ; he shall draw, Pist. And I to Ford shall eke unfold, shall tap : said I well, bully Hector?
How Falstaff, varlet vile, Fal. Do so, good mine host.
His dove will prove, his gold will hold, Host. I have spoke; let him follow : let me see
And his soft couch defile. thee, froth and lime : I am at a word; follow. [Exit. Nym. My humour shall not cool : I will incense
Fal. Bardolph, follow him; a tapster is a good Page to deal with poison ; I will possess him with trade : an old cloak makes a new jerkin; a withered yellowness, for the revolt of mien is dangerous : that serving-man, a fresh tapster : go adieu.
is my true humour. Bard. It is a life that I have desired; I will thrive. Pist. Thou art the Mars of malcontents : I second [ Exit. thee; troop on.
Exeunt. Pist. O hase Gongarian wight! wilt thou the spigot wield 1
SCENE IV. A Room in Dr. Caius's House. Nym. He was gotten in drink : is not the humoar conceited ? His mind is not heroic, and there's the Enter Mrs. Quickly, Simple, and Rugby. humour of it.
Quick. What; John Rugby! I pray thee, go to Fal. I am glad, I am so acquit of this tinder-box; the casement, and see if you can see my master, mashis thefts were too open : his filching was like an ter doctor Caius, coming : if he do, i'faith, and find unskilful singer, he kept not time.
any body in the house, here will be an old abusing of Nym. The good humour is, to steal at a minute's God's patience, and the king's English. rest.
Rug. I'll go watch.
[Exit. Pist. Convey, the wise it call : steal ! foh; a fico Quick. Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon at for the phrase !
night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire. Fal. Well, sirs, I am almost out at heels.
An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant shall Pist. Why then let kibes ensue.
come in house withal; and, I warrant you, no tell Pal. There is no remedy; I must coney-catch; I tale, nor no breed-bate bis worst fault is, that he is must shift.
given to prayer; he is something peevish that way: Pist. Young ravens must have food.
but nobody but has his fault ;--but let that pass. Fal. Which of yon know Ford of this town!
Peter Simple, you say your name is ? Pist. I ken the wight; he is of substance good. Sim. Ay, for fault of a better.
Fal. My honest lads, I will tell yon what I am Quick. And master Slender's your master ? about.
Sim. Ay, forsooth. Pist. Two yards, and more.
Quick. Does he not wear a great round beard, like Fal. No quips now, Pistol ; indeed I am in the
a glover's paring-knife ! waist two yards abont: but I am now about no waste;
Sim. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love with a little yellow beard ; a cane-coloured beard. to Ford's wife; I spy entertainment in her ; she
Quick. A softly-sprighted man, is he not? discourses, she carves, she gives the leer of invita šim. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his tion : I can construe the action of her familiar style ; hands, as any is between this and his head; he hath and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be Éng- fought with a warrener. lish'd rightly, is, I am sir John Falstaff's.
Quick. How say you !-0, I shonld remember him; Pist. He huth studied her well, and translated her does he not hold up his head, as it were t and strut well : out of honesty into English.
in his gait? Nym. T'he anchor is deep: will that humour pass! S'm. Yes, indeed, does he. Fal. Now, the report goes, she has all the rule of
Quich. Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse her husband's purse; she hath legions of angels. fortune! Tell master parson Evans, I will do what I
Pist. As many devils entertain; and, To her boy, can for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I say I.
wish Nym. 'The humour rises; it is good : humour me
Re-enter Rugby the angels.
Fal. I have writ me here a letter to her and here Rug. Out, alas ! here comes my master. another to Page's wife ; who even now gave me good Quick. We shall all be shent : run in here, good eyes too, examin'd my parts with most judicious ey- young man ; go into this closet. (Shuts Simple in the líads : sometimes the beam of her view gilded ny Closet] He will not stay long.- What, John Rugby! foot, sometimes my portly belly.
John, what, Joho, I say !-Go, John, go inquire for Pist. Then did the sun on dunghill shine. my master: I doubt, he be not well, that he comes not Nym. I thank thee for that humour.
home :--and down, doron, adown-a, &c. (Sings.
Enter Doctor Caius.
Quick. The better, that it pleases your good worCaius. Vat is you sing? I do not like dese toys; ship to ask. Pray you, go and vetch me in my closet un boitier Fent. What news ? how does pretty mistress Anne! verd ; a box, a green-a box; do intend vat I speak ? Quick. In truth, sir, and she is pretty, and honest, a green-a box.
and gentle ; and one that is your friend, I can tell you Quick. Ay, forsooth, I'll fetch it you. I am glad that by the way, I praise heaven for it. he went not in himself; if he had found the
young Fent. Shall I do any good, thinkest thou ? Shall I he would have been horn-mad. (Aside not lose my suit ! Caius. Fe, fe, fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je Quick. I'roth, sir, all is in his hands above: but m'en vais a la cour, -la grande affaire.
notwithstanding, master Fenton, I'll be sworn on a Quick. Is it this, sir?
book, she loves you :-Have not your worship a wart Caius. Ouy; mette le au mon pocket; depeche, above your eye? quickly:Vere is dat knave Rugby?
Pent. Yes, marry, have 1; what of that? Quick. What, John Rugby? John!
Quick. Well, thereby hangs a tale ;--good faith, Rug. Here, sir.
it is such another Nan-but, I detest, an honest maid Caius. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack as ever broke bread :- We had an hour's talk of that Rugby : come, take-a your rapier, and come after my wart ;--I shall never laugh but in that maid's comheel to de court.
pany-But, indeed, she is given too much to alliRug. 'Tis ready, sir, bere in the porch.
choly and musing : but for you--Well, go to. Caius. By my trot, I tarry too long :--Od's me! Fent. Well, I shall see her to-day: hold, there's Qu'ay j'oublie ? dere is some simples in my closet, dat money for thee; let me have thy voice in my behalf : I will not for the varld I shall leave behind.
if thou seest her before me, commend meQuick. Ah me! he'll find the young man there, and Quick. Will, I ? i'faith, that we will: and I will be mad.
tell your worship more of the wart, the next time we Caius. O diable, diable! vat is in my closet !--Vil have confidence; and of other wooers. lany! larron! (Pulling Simple out] Rugby, my ra Fent. Well, farewell; I am in great haste now. pier.
[Erit. Quick. Good master, be content.
Quick. Farewell to your worship.-Traly, an hoCaius. Verefore shall I be content-a!
pest gentleman; but Anne loves him not; for I Quick. The young man is an honest man.
know Anne's mind as well as another does :-Out Caius. Vat shall de honest man do in my closet? upon't! what have I forgot?
[Exit. dere is no honest man dat shall come in my closet.
Quick. I beseech yon, be not so flegmatic; hear the truth of it: he came of an errand to me from parson
SCENE I. Before Page's House.
Enter Mistress Page, with a Letter. Quick. Peace, I pray you.
Mrs. Page. What! have I 'scaped love-letters in Caius. Peace-a your tongue :--Speak-a your tale. Sim. To desire this honest gentlewoman, your subject for them? Let me see :
the holy-day time of my beauty, and am I now a
[Reads. maid, to speak a good word to mistress Anne Page, for my master, in the way of marriage.
Ask me no reason why I love you; for though love Quick. This is all, indeed, la; but I'll ne'er pat his counsellor : You are not young, no more am I ;
use reason for his precisian, he admits him not for my finger in the fire, and need not. Caius. Sir Hugh send-a you ?--Ragby, bailles me 1; ha! ha! then there's more sympathy; you love
go to then, there's sympathy: you are merry, so am some paper :-Tarry you a little a while. Writes, sack, and
so do 1; would you desire better sympaQuick. I am glad he is so quiet: if he had been thy? Let it sufice' thee, mistress Page (at the least, thoroughly moved, you should have heard him so loud, and so melancholy ;--but notwithstanding, man,
if the love of a soldier can suffice), that I love thee. I'll do your master what good I can : and the very but I say, love me. By me,
I will not say, pity me, 'tis not a soldier-like phrase ; yea and the no is, the French doctor, my master,-i
Thine oun true knight, may call him my master, look you, for I keep his house; and I wash, wring, brew, bake, scour, dress meat and
By day or night, drivk, make the beds, and do all myself;
Or any kind of light,
With all his might, Sim. 'Tis a great charge, to come under one body's hand.
For thee to fight, Quick. Are you avis'd o'that? you shall find it a
John Falstaff. great charge and to be up early, and down late world !-one that is well nigh worn to pieces with
What a Herod of Jewry is this !- wicked, wicked but notwithstanding (to tell you in your ear; I would have no words of it ;) my master himself is in love age, to show himself a young gallant! What an unwith mistress Anne Page but notwithstanding that, weighed behaviour hath
this Flemish drunkard pick-I know Anne's mind, that's neither here nor there.
ed (with the devil's name) out of my conversation, Caius. You jack’nape ; give-a dis letter to sir that he dares in this manner assay me? Why, he Hugh; by gar, it is a shallenge : I vill cut his
troat hath not been thrice in my company --What should in de park, and I will teach a seurvy jack-a-nape heaven forgive me !-Why, I'll exhibit a bill in the
I say to him!--I was then frugal of iny mirth :priest not good you tarry here :-by gar, i vill cut all his parliament for the putting down of men. How shall two stones
; by gar, he shall not have a stone to i be revenged on him ? "for revenged I will be, as trow at his dog.
sure as his gats are made of puddings. Quick. Alas, he speaks but for his friend.
Enter Mistress Ford. Caius. It is no matter-a for dat :-do not you tell-a Mrs. Ford. Mistress Page ! trust me, I was going me dat I shall have Anne Page for myself!--by gar, to your house. I vill kill de Jack priest; and I have appointed mine Mrs. Page. And, trust me, I was coming to you. host of de Jarterre to measure our weapon :-by gar, You look very ill. I vill myself bave Anne Page.
Mrs. Ford. Nay, I'll ne'er believe that; I have to Quick. Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall be show to the contrary. well, we must give folks leave to prate : What the Mrs. Page. 'Faith, but you do, in my mind. good-jer!
Mrs. Ford. Well, I do then; yet I say, I could Caius. Rugby, come to de court vit me ;-by gar, show you to the contrary : 0, mistress Page, give me if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your head out some counsel ! of my door :-- Follow my heels, Rugby
Mrs. Page. What's the matter, woman ! [Exeunt Caius and Rugby. Mrs. Ford. O woman, if it were not for one triQuick. You shall have An fool's-head of your own. fling respect, I could come to such honour ! No, I know Anne's mind for that: never
Mrs. Page. Mang the trifle, woman; take the hoin Windsor knows more of Anne's mind than I do; nour: what is it?
-dispense with trifles ;-what is nor can do more than I do with her, I thank heaven. it? Fent. [Within) Who's within there, ho?
Mrs. Ford. If I would but go to hell for an eterQuick. Who's there, I trow ! Come near the house, nal moment, or so, I could be knighted. I pray you.
Mrs. Page. What ?--thou liest!--Sir Alice Ford ! Enter Fenton.
--These knights will hack; and so thou shouldst Pent. How now, good woman ; how dost thou ? not alter the article of thy gentry.
Mrs. Ford. We burn day-light :---here, read, read; Page. I will not believe such a Cataian, though the --perceive how I might be knighted.--I shall think priest o'the town commended him for a true man. the worse of fat men, as long as I have an eye to Ford. "Twas a good sensible fellow : Well. make difference of men's liking: and yet he would Page. How now, Meg! not swear; praised women's modesty : and gave Mrs. Page. Whither go you, George ! -Hark you. such orderly and well-behaved reproof to all an Mrs. Ford. How now, sweet Frank ! why art thou comeliness, that I would have sworn his disposition melancholy? would have gone to the truth of his words: but they Ford. I melancholy ! I am not melancholy.-Get do no more adhere and keep place together, than the you home, go. hundredth psalm to the tune of Green sleeves. What Mrs. Ford. 'Faith, thou hast some crotchets in thy tempest, I trow, threw this whale, with so many tons bead now.-Will you go, mistress Page ! of oil in his helly, ashore at Windsor ! How shall I Mrs. Page. Have with you.-You'll come to dinner, be revenged on him ! I think the best way were to George ! --Look, who comes yonder: she shall be our entertain him with hope, till the wicked fire of lust messenger to this paltry knight. have melted him in his own grease. -Did you ever
[Aside to Mrs. Ford. bear the like!
Enter Mistress Quickly.
Mrs. Ford. Trust me, I thought her : she'll fit it.
Mrs. Page. You are come to see my daughter Anne. mystery of ill opinions, here's the twin-brother of thy leiter but let thine inherit first : for, I protest, mine
Quick. Ay, forsooth ; And, I pray, how does good
mistress Anne? never shall. I warrant, he hath a thousand of these letters, writ with blank space for different names
Mrs. Page. Co in with us, and see ; we have an (sure more), and these are of the second edition he hour's talk with you. will print them out of doubt : for he cares not what
(Exeunt Mrs. Page, Mrs. Ford, and Mrs. Quickly. he pnts into the press, when he would put as two.
Page. How now, master Ford ? I had rather be a giantess, a d lie ander mount Pe
Ford. You heard what this knave told me; did you
not? lion. Well, I will find you twenty lascivious turtles, ere one chaste man.
Page. Yes; and you heard what the other told me?
Ford. Do you think there is truth in them! Mrs. Ford. Why, this is the very same; the very hand, the very words: what doth he thiok of us!
Page. Hang 'em, slaves ! I do not think the knight Mrs. Page. Nay, I know not : it makes me almost would offer it but these that accuse him in his in
tent towards our wives, are a yuke of his discarded ready to wrangle with mine own honesty. P'll entertain myself like one that I am not acquainted men; yery rogues, now they be out of service. withal; for, sure, unless he know some strain in me,
Ford, Were they his men ! that I know not myself, he would never have board
Page. Marry, were they. ed me in this fury.
Ford. I like it never the better for that Does he Mrs. Ford. Boarding, call you it!
'll be sure to lie at the Garter? keep him above deck.
Page. Ay, marry, does he. If he should intend Mrs. Page. So wir I; if he come under my
this voyage towards my wife, I would turn her loose batches, I'll never to sen again. Let's be revenged
to him; and what be gets more of her than sharp on him: let's appoint him a meeting; give him a show words let it lie on my head.
Ford. I do not misdoubt my wife ; but I would be bated delay, till he hath pawn'd his horses to mine oath to turn them together. A man may be too conshost of the Garter.
dent: I would have nothing lie on my head : I canMrs. Ford. Nay, I will consent to act any villany not be thus satisfied. against him, that may not sully the chariness of our
Page. Look, where my ranting host of the Garter honesty. o, that my husband saw this letter! it comes : there is either liquor in his pate, or money in would give eternal food to his jealousy.
his purse, when he looks so merrily.--How now, Mrs. Page. Why, look, where he comes; and my mine host?
Enter Host and Shallow. good man too: he's as far from jealousy, as I am from giving him cause ; and that, I hope, is an unmea Host. How now, bully-rook ? thou’rt a gentleman : surable distance.
ca valero-justice, I say. Mrs. Ford. You are the happier woman.
Shal. Í follow, mine host, I follow.--Good even, Mrs. Page. Let's consult together against this and twenty, good master Page! Master Page, will greasy knight: come hither.
[They retire. you go with us! we have sport in hand. Bnter Ford, Pistol, Page, and Nym.
Host. Tell him, cavalero-justice, tell him, bully
rook. Ford. Well, I hope, it be pot be so.
Shal. Sir, there is a fray to be fought, between sir Pist. Hope is a curtail dog in some affairs : Hugh the Welsh priest, and Caias the French doctor. Sir John affects thy wife.
Ford. Good mine host o'the Garter, a word with Ford. Why, sir, my wife is not young. [poor, you
Pist. He wooes both high and Inw, both rich and Host. What say'st thou, bnlly-rook! Both young and old, one with another, Ford ;
[They go aside. He loves thy gally-mawfry; Ford, perpend.
Shal. Will you ( To Page) go with us to behold it? Ford. Love my wife?
my merry host hath had the measuring of their weaPist. With liver burping hot : prevent, or go thou, puns! and, I think, he hath appointed them contrary Like sir Actron he, with Ring-wood at thy heels: places : for, believe me, I hear, the parson is no o, odious is the name!
jester. Hark, I will tell you what our sport shall be. Foru. What name, sir ?
Host. Hast thou no suit against my knight, my Pist. The horn, I say : farewell. Enight : guest-cavalier ! Take heed; have open eye; for thieves do foot by Ford. Noue, I protest: but I'll give you a pottle of Take heed, ere summer comes, or cuckoo-birds do burnt sack to give me recourse to him, and tell him, Away, sir corporal Nym.
[sing. my name is Brook; only for a jest. Believe it, Page ; he speaks sense. [Exit. Host. My hand, bolly: thou shalt have egress and
Ford. I will be patient; I will find out this. regress ; suid I well ? and thy name shall be Brook :
Nym. And this is true ; (To Page] I like not the It is a verry knight.--Will you go on, hearts ! humour of lying. He hath wrong'd me in some hu Shal. Have with you, mine host. mons; I should have borne the humoured letter to Page. I have heard, the French man hath good skill her : but I have a sword, and it shall bite upon my in bis rapier. necessity. He loves your wife; there's the short and Shal. Tut, sir, I could have told you more : In the long. My name is corporal Nym; I speak, and these times you stand on distance, your passes, stocI avouch. "Tis true:---my name is Nym, and Falstaff cadoes, and I know not what: 'tis the heart, master loves your wife. --Adieu i I love not the humour of Puge; 'tis here, 'tis here. I have seen the time, bread and cheese ; and there's the humour of it. with my long sword, I would have made you four Adieu.
[Exit.tall fellows skip like rats, Page. The humour of it, qaoth 'a! here's a fellow Host. Here, boys, here, here I shall we wag? frights humour out of his wits.
Page. Have with you I had rather hear them Ford. I will seek out Falstaff.
scold than tight. (Exeunt Host, Shallow, ani Page, Page. I never heard such a drawling, affecting Fori. Though Page be a secure fool, and stands so rogue.
firmly on his wife's frailty, yet I cannot put off my Ford. If I do find it, well.
opinion so easily : She was in his company at Page's
house; and, what they made there, I know not. Fal. But what says she to me! be brief, my good Well, I will look further into't: and I have a dis-she Mercury. guise to sound Falstaff: if I find her honest, I lose Quick. Marry, she hath received your letter; for not my labour : if she be otherwise, 'tis labour well the which she thanks you a thousand times ; and she bestowed.
[Exit. gives you to notify, that her husband will be absence
from his house between ten and eleven. SCENE II. A Room in the Garter Inn.
Fal. Ten and eleven!
Quick. Ay, forsooth; and then you may come and Enter Falstaff and Pistol.
see the picture, she says, that you wot of;---master Pal. I will not lend thee a penny.
Ford, her husband, will be from home. Alas! the Pist. Why, then the world's mine oyster. sweet woman leads an ill life with him; he's a very Which I with sword will open.
jealousy man ; she leads a very frampold life with I will retort the sum in equipage.
him, good heart. Pal. Not a penny. I have been content, sir, you Fal. Ten and eleven : Woman, commend me to should lay my countenance to pawn: I have grated her ; I will not fail her. upon my good friends for three reprieves for you and Quick. Why, you say well! But I have another your coach-fellow, Nym; or else you had looked messenger to your worship : Mistress Page bath her through the grate like a geminy of baboons. I am hearty commendations to you too ;--and let me tell damned in hell, for swearing to gentlemen, my friends, you in your ear, she's as fartuous a civil modest wife, you were good soldiers, and tall fellows: and when and one (I tell you that will not miss your morning mistress Bridget lost the handle of her fan, I took't nor evening prayer, as any is in Windsor, whoe'er upon mine honour, thou hadst it not.
be the other and she bade me tell your worship, Pist. Didst thou not share? hadst thou not fifteen- that her husband is seldom from home ; but, she pence!
hopes, there will come a time. I never knew a woPal. Reason, yoa rogue, reason . Think'st thou, man so dote upon a man : surely, I think you have I'll endanger my soul gratis ? At a word, hang no charms, la ; yes, in truth. more about me, I am no gibbet for you :-go.-A Fal. Not I, I assure thee ; setting the attraction of short knife and a throng:--to your manor of Pickt- my good parts aside, I bave no other charms. hatch, go. You'll not bear a letter for me, you Quick. Blessing on your heart for't ! rogue !-you stand upon your honour !-Why, thou Ful. But, I pray thee, tell me this: has Ford's unconfinable baseness, it is as much as I can do, to wife, and Page's wife, acquainted each other how keep the terms of my honour precise. I, I, I myself they love me? sometimes, leaving the fear of heaven on the left Quick. That were a jest indeed !--they have not so hand, and hiding mine honoar in my necessity, am little grace, I hope :--that were a trick, indeed ! But fain to shuffle, to hedge, and to lurch ; and yet you, mistress Page would desire you to send her your little rogue, will ensconce your rags, your cat-a-mountain page, of all loves ; her husband has a marvelloas inlooks, your red-lattice phrases, and your bold-beating fection to the little page : and, truly, master Page is oaths, under the shelter of your honour! You will an honest man. Never a wife in Windsor leads a not do it, you ?
better life than she does; do what she will, say Pist. I do relent; What wouldst thou more of man? what she will, take all, pay all, go to bed when
she list, rise when she list, all is as she will; and Enter Robin.
truly she deserves it : for if there be a kind woman Rob. Sir, here's a woman would speak with you. in Windsor, she is one. You must send her your Fal. Let her approach.
page; no remedy. Enter Mistress Quickly.
Fal. Why, I will.
Quick. Nay, but do so then : and, look you, he Quick. Give your worship good morrow.
may come and go between you both; and, in any case, Fal. Good morrow, good wife.
have a nay-word, that you may know one another's Quick. Not so, an't please your worship.
mind, and the boy never need to understand any Fal. Good maid, then.
thing; for 'tis not good that children should know Quick. I'll be sworn; as my mother was, the first any wickedness: old folks, you know, bave discrehoir I was born.
tion, as they say, and know the world. Pal. I do believe the swearer: What with me? Fal, Fare thee well : commend me to them both :
Quick. Shall I vouchsafe your worship a word or there's my purse: I am yet thy debtor.--Boy,, go two
along with this woman.-'fhis news distracts me! Fal. Two thousand, fair woman; and I'll vouch
[ Exeunt Quickly and Robin. safe thee the hearing. Quick. There is one mistress Ford, sir ;--I pray, Clap on more sails ; pursue, np with your fights ;
Pist. This punk is one of Capid's carriers :--come a little nearer this ways :- I myself dwell with Give fire ; she is my prize, or ocean whelm them all! master doctor Caius.
(Exit. Fal. Well, on: Mistress Ford, you say,
Pal. Say'st thou so, old Jack? go thy ways; I'll Quick. Your worship says very true : I pray your make more of thy old body than I have done. Will worship, come a little nearer this ways.
they yet look after thee? Wilt thoa, after the ex. Fal.' 'warrant thee nobody hears ;-mine own pense of so much money, be now a gainer! Good people, mine own people.
body. I thank thee : Let them say, 'tis grossly done ; Quick. Are they so ! Heaven bless them, and make so it be fairly done, no matter. then his servants ! Fal. Well : mistress Ford ;-wbat of her ?
Enter Bardolph. Quick. Why, sir, she's a good creatare. Lord, Bard. Sir John, there's one master Brook below lord! your worship's a wantou: Well, heaven for would fain speak with you, and be acquainted with give you, and all of us, I pray !
you; and bath sent your worship a morning's draught Fal. Mistress Ford-come, mistress Ford.
of sack. Quick. Marry, this is the short and the long of it; Fal. Brook, is his name? you have brought her into such a canaries, as 'tis Bard. Ay, sir. wonderful. The best courtier of them all, when the Fal. Call him in ; [Exit Bardolph] Such Brooks court lay at Windsor, could never have brought her are welcome to me, that overflow such liquor. Ah ! to such a canary. Yet there has been knights, and ha! mistress Ford and mistress Page, have I enlords, and gentlemen, with their coaches; I warrant compass'd you ? go to; via ! you, coach after coach, letter after letter, gift after gift; smelling so sweetly (all musk,) and so rusbling,
Re-enter Bardolph, with Ford disguised. I warrant you, in silk and gold; and in such alli Ford. Bless you, sir. gant terms; and in such wine and sugar of the best, Fal. And you sir : would yon speak with me! and the fairest, that would have won any woman's Ford. I make bold, to press with so little prepaheart; and, I warrant you, they could never get an ration upon you. eye-wink of her.--I had myself twenty angels given Fal. You're welcome ; what's your will! Give us me this morning: but I defy all angels (in any suchi leave, drawer,
(Exit Bardolph. sort, as they say), but in the way of honesty --and, Ford. Sir, I am a gentleman that have spent much ; I warrant you, they could never get her so much as my name is Brook. sip on a cup with the proudest of them all: and yet Fal. Good master Brook, I desire more acquaintthere has been earls, nay, which is more, pensioners; ance of you. bat, I warrant you, all is one with her.
Ford. Good sir John, I sue for yours : not to charge