Sivut kuvina
PDF
ePub

those cherished gems, and bid her ever remember, that for every pearl on that string, a true and warm heart had throbbed for her when she was even yet a stranger in the land. Collected by our tenantry within the depths of this mountain lake, each had selected his fairest prize, to present with the "cead mille failtha" that welcomed home the foreign bride. And the clasp,that rare and wondrous one-was added by my father, as the fittest accompaniment for an offering like this, for through many a generation had descended the legion of that ancestor, who in deep trouble had vowed a pilgrimage to Gongane Borra, and had during his lonely vigil, been directed by a vision, of which this miraculous token was always preserved in the family as a talisman, and called from its origin, "St. Bridget's tear."

'No vain ornament was this, to be worn amidst the gaities of the world; so prompted as well by gratitude as by religion, that sweet mother had devoted all to a holier, a more appropriate use. I speak as I thought of those matters at the time, for then on my heart returned the soft voice that had so often hushed my young spirit, and I seemed again within her quiet chamber to hear the sound of those pearly drops, as one by one they fell through her fingers in unison with each meekly uttered prayer. Yet even while I thus remembered, a still clearer vision rose; pale and wasted, her figure was kneeling, but the rosary was no longer there her hands were clasped over that well remembered volume, and words of holy import were breathing from her lips; her dying hour came, and it rested on her pillow; in the latest moment of all, when every earthly tie was loosened, every farewell spoken, when friend and domestic stood hushed around her bed, and husband

;

and child still hung over her in agony, she had aroused her failing energies once more, and placing the precious volume in the hands of Father Eustace, had uttered that one admonitory word "remember!" with a tone as significant as that of the martyred monarch; and then, while the last faint flush lingered in her cheek, the last light in her eye, she had drawn me to her bosom, and in accents, impressive from their very weakness had whispered," In after days, my darling, call this moment to your mind, and remember, I am trusting in Christ alone at the foot of His cross I can now lay every care ;-Oh seek Him, seek Him there, my child-and in death or in life we shall never be divided."

[ocr errors]

I understood not her meaning then; I knew it not in those "after years; none ever explained, perhaps none heard those faint dying words; but there they remained graven for ever on my heart, and now partly enlightened by this bright association, I turned to Father Eustace; he seemed to read my thoughts; and broke the lengthened silence by these words, "Florence, do you remember that mother?" and awaking at the question as from a dream, I poured forth in language as vehement as my feelings, the long slumbering memories that hour had revived.

'He listened to the end, often sighing, but in silence, even until I had said, that in trying to fulfil her last promise, "that in life or in death we should never be divided," I had identified her with every religious feeling; I had mingled her name with every prayer, that she was the saint I had chosen, even when seeking the intercession of the holy Virgin mother, for I knew that a mother's petitions were most likely to touch her heart, and my own heart ever told me that even amongst the blest ones, there was none holier or purer than she.

66

'Father Eustace shuddered as I spoke, and made a gesture as if to check me, while an indescribable expression of suffering rested on his face, and more to himself than to me, he murmured in accents of deepest sadness, poor child,-poor child; have I then delayed too long; oh what a way to learn Christ."-Then with a look and tone of most gentle compassion he continued, "Oh my daughter! when you speak of heavenly sympathy, know you nothing of that Saviour, Jesus the Son of God, who in passing into the heavens has borne with Him the feeling of our infirmities; seeing, that while on this earth He was in all points tempted like as we are, sin alone excepted: have you never made Him your intercessor, and felt that through Him and Him only, you may come boldly to the throne of grace; and Oh, have you never asked yourself, whether prayer, such as you describe, a mingled sentiment of earthliness and devotion, was an offering suitable to bring before the footstool of the most High : has no thought of that majesty, that glory whereunto no created thing approacheth, made you ever seek the only true Mediator between God and man, or have you ever raised your thoughts to that Divine Creator, have you ever offered a prayer to God Himself?"

"I shrank appalled beneath those deeply searching questions, and at the solemnity of the ideas presented to my mind, they conveyed an impression of the paramount importance and supremacy of the Almighty, such as I never had received before; for even though I might have acknowledged it in words, in works I had denied it, and I bowed my head beneath the conviction, that I had indeed put Him far from me. I had never honoured Him by a voluntary homage, and though I had prayed for guidance in perplexity, for comfort in

affliction, it was too true, that I had never made God Himself my present help in any time of trouble. And yet, could such worship be accepted, could it be offered by an erring, ignorant child? Oh no, my weak nature shrank at the thought to stand unsheltered before that awful presence; without angel, or saint, parent, friend, or advocate, united to my being by any human or kindred tie to interpose between my frail spirit and the Omnipotent: it could not be; unshielded thus I durst not approach Him: this could not have been the meaning of his words, and bewildered and overpowered by conflicting doubts and fears, I threw myself on my knees, and with clasped hands and streaming eyes exclaimed, "Oh holy father, pray for me!-teach me to pray!"

'A gleam of momentary light shone through the sad expression with which he had contemplated me, and placing his hand upon my drooping head, he said, "Even thus, as a little child must earth's greatest and mightiest come, for of such is the kingdom of heaven. But not upon me, my daughter, not upon any arm of flesh must you lean; let your help be in the name of the Lord; there is no other name given among men, whereby we can be saved; and Oh, be assured that however beloved, however excellent, or exalted, were those we have known or heard of, as saints upon this earth, those who we believe to be now numbered amongst the glorified ones in heaven, their everlasting cry will be, "Not unto us, not unto us, but unto thy name be the glory;" their increasing acknowledgment, "not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy He saved us, by the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Ghost."

'I listened with wonder-with reverence-but with

sorrow too; it seemed as if a wall of separation had been suddenly erected between me and that ideal companionship, hitherto my solace and delight; though Christ was the chief corner stone, still I stumbled at that stumbling-block, and my heart would have rebelled against a doctrine as new as it was painful, had it not been delivered with an authority derived from sources both human and divine. Father Eustace had presented the symbol of each message in that holy book, that sacred memorial; and I could not close my ears against an ambassador, thus, it were, as accredited from anothe world; in the soft mysterious light of that once sacred relic, my excited fancy seemed to catch an emanation from above; her pure spirit seemed to shine in its transparent rays, and to sanction the opinions her messenger expressed.

'But why,' I exclaimed, 'Oh why was I left in ignorance of her wishes; why were those precious tokens retained in secrecy so long; and oh how has it happened that to accident alone, I am indebted for their recovery at last?"

66

'I know that my tone must have been passionate and upbraiding, but with the same unvarying gentleness he answered me again. Say not so, my daughter, there is no accident in God's holy, wise, and merciful providence. Oh! rather with deep gratitude, recognize the guidance of His loving hand, and believe that it alone has led you to seek comfort in your sorrow, from him who was entrusted with your dying mother's wish: and blame not the delay, nor conclude I was neglectful or indifferent; but examine your own heart, and ask, whether it performed a faithful, a dutiful part; whether its intelligence was ever exerted in understanding that closing scene, so well remembered in its affection;

« EdellinenJatka »