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himself to have always a conscience void of offence toward God and toward men," Acts xxiv. 16.

Thirdly. That Prodigalis had "left his first love," Rev. ii. 4: that, as iniquity had abounded, his love had waxed cold; and therefore he had apostatized in heart from his God. Nor could he be deemed one of the number of them that persevere; for "he that endureth to the end [in his first love] shall be saved."

The plaintiff further shewed, That the thoughts of Prodigalis were often very carnal; and that, instead of having every thought brought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, at certain seasons he had not a thought for Christ.

Fourthly. That Prodigalis not only allowed these wanderings of heart, but at times really encouraged them, and seemed to be entertained by them, especially when the presence of his Lord was gone; and therefore he could not say, "I hate vain thoughts, but thy law do I love."

Fifthly. That he not only indulged these vain thoughts that lodged within him; but that in the hours of sensible desertion he had endeavoured to suck comfort from them.

Sixthly. That in some of his peevish fits he had even envied the happiness of the wicked, who "are not in trouble as other men, nor plagued like other men."

Seventhly. That he had gone so far in this his peevishness as to call the proud happy, whom God resisteth and in his deep poverty he had called the covetous blessed, whom the Lord abhorreth.

Eighthly. That Prodigalis had not only given in

to them in heart and word, but that he had been brought into captivity to the law of sin that is in his members.

Ninthly. The plaintiff appealed to the heart, thoughts, and conscience, of Prodigalis for confirmation; and asked if he could say that his rejoicing was in "the testimony of a good conscience," as Paul did? Nor could he say, "Happy is the man that condemneth not himself in the thing which he alloweth,' Rom. xiv. 22. Nay, said the plaintiff, you are so far from this, that thy own thoughts condemn thee. Therefore thou canst not lay thine hand upon thy heart and say, in an holy triumph, " In the multitude of my thoughts within me thy comforts delight my soul," Psalm xciv. 19. The plaintiff added, "He that is born of God sinneth not."

text.

Ahimaaz. Why then the devil sticks to his old

Cushi. Yes; and he will stick to it until the poor believer either find out the real meaning of it, or else fall into error or despondency under the devil's temptations about it. Satan threw down Adam with a text of scripture, and took the same method when he tempted the Son of God.

Ahimaaz. I think this is one of the most puzzling trials that ever Prodigalis had. It is a dreadful thing to a soul that is quickened, humbled, and blessed with a tender feeling of the evil of sin, and with a filial fear of God, and a heart bent to honour him, for such an one to be so left of God as for his old wretched customs to be pursuing his mind, and entangling his thoughts, after he has so sorely suffered under the sight and

sense of them. But, as poor Job says, Such possess the iniquity of their youth, even in that sense, though not the guilt of them.

For my part, I have often wished that God had taken me to himself in my first love; or else had granted me a residence where I might never see man, woman, or child; yea, neither sun, moon, nor stars. For the world is full of nothing but evil; look which way you will, sin presents itself; and, if that steals on the heart, then my comforts die; I wish either for heaven, or for the lonely cot of a hermit.

you

Cushi. If you had died in your first love, how could you have served your generation? And, if were shut up like a hermit, how could you let your light shine before men, that they may see your good

works?

Your first request savours of a distrust of God's power to keep you; and the last of cowardice and a narrow spirit; just as if the devil was to be left sole ranger of the world, because he has spread the earth with traps! No; it well becomes the saints, as good soldiers of Jesus Christ, to seek the welfare of the children of Israel, and the kingdom of their ever blessed Lord; to oppose the devil's reign, and expose the devil's works also; and so to weaken his interest as much as possible. And, though we find it a perilous work, and are in imminent danger at it, yet the battle is the Lord's; the cause of truth is the Lord's cause; and his truth is our armour; and the promise of victory is sure to all the seed. The Lord tells us to quit ourselves like men, instead of creeping into holes and we may depend upon it that his

strength will be made perfect in our weakness, because he hath promised it. And when he comes to say, in the great day, "Well done, good and faithful servant, enter thou into the joy of thy Lord," that will pay for all.

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Ahimaaz. Pray how long did Prodigalis labour under this trial?

Cushi. For many months; yet no man could hate sin more; no man mourned over it, struggled with it, or prayed against it, more than he did: but, notwithstanding all his efforts, he found himself to be a man burdened with the body of sin and death, which, God knows, he sorely groaned under. Besides, his situation was none of the most pleasing; he had a large flock to feed, whether his own soul was flourishing or barren; he had many enemies in the world, as well as friends; his enemies watched for his halting, and his friends looked at him as a copy: the first looked for destruction, and the latter for perfection, and both were deceived; for, though he had as base a heart as the worst of them, and more temptations to grapple with than all of them, yet God did not permit him to be utterly cast down, to gratify his enemies, though there was enough exposed to convince his friends that he was not perfect, but that the treasure was in an earthen vessel.

The poor creature travailed in this way till his very soul was bowed down within him, and Satan tempted him even to choose "strangling rather than life," Job vii. 15; or to drown himself, rather than suffer thus; yea, he wanted him to imitate Jonah, leave the work, and flee from it; he was so beset with

temptations, and with conscience, that his very heart and soul failed him. However, at last he went to his Lord with as heavy a heart as mortal could bear. He first sat down in his chair and reasoned with his Lord, until his sorrow began to give way; he then kneeled down, confessed, wept, pleaded, and supplicated, until he obtained these sweet words as an answer to his prayer" If our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things," 1 John iii. 20. He immediately felt strength communicated to his soul; his accusing conscience was silenced; he got up from his knees, and put the devil to flight with this text-"My flesh and my heart faileth, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever," Psalm lxxiii. 26.

Now was the dear Redeemer more precious to Prodigalis than ever; his soul was sweetly becalmed, and blessed with a double portion of life and peace; every evil thought of his heart vanished; every besetting sin was detested and abhorred, and heaven itself seemed, if possible, to be in full view; and the poor man vainly thought, and indeed often said, that he was ripening for glory; that his work was pretty well done; that he should not be long in this world, and that he was too happy to live. But the Lord counterbalanced his anxiety for heaven, by laying the concerns of his flock in the midst of wolves; his wife, family, and friends, on his mind; which brought him into "a strait betwixt two, having a desire to depart and to be with Christ, which is better" than being here; "nevertheless, to abide in the flesh is more needful for you, (Phil. i. 23, 24) says Paul; and

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